Happy Birthday...to me?

I have a pretty poor track record with birthdays.
It stems, I think, from an awful memory for dates. It took me 20 years to learn my parents birthday, and I still am not exactly reflexive about knowing the current date, and connecting it to the day a person was born.
Last year, I was actually in San Antonio the weekend before my mom's birthday. She made a point to preemptively chide me about the fact that I wasn't going to call her that wednesday, and I indignantly replied that I would OF COURSE call her on her birthday. I followed through with that promise.
She didn't answer when I called, so I left a message. She told all of her bible study friends, "oh, that was just my daughter calling to wish me a happy birthday". She later listened to the message, and I think it went something like this:
"Hey momma! I was just realizing that I am actually getting kinda low on funds, so since rent is coming up I should probably get some money. Anyway, call me later... love you!"

IDIOT...freaking IDIOT!!!

I called my mom on her birthday to ask for money. I am a massive failure.
I was actually pretty torn up about it when she told me. I cried and stuff. My roomates had to do the whole pat-on-the-back "she still loves you" kind of pep talk.
Anyway, she does still love me, and the incident was written off as " oh...we know how you are, Kara. It was funny. Don't do that next year."
I also have to point out that I really de-emphasize my own birthdays, since I had very traumatic experiences with my birthday parties when I was young. They aren't the kind of stories that one looks back on and laughs. These are stories that made me teary when I retold them only three years ago. After a first grade party it took me a few years to recover, and I tried again in the 5th grade. I vowed that night to never have another bday party. I followed through. Nothing for 16, nothing for 18, and nothing for 21. Dinner is as far as I go.
Even dinner stunk for my 15th, when I went to Logan's roadhouse with my Mom and Aunt. They told the waitress it was my birthday, which is a bad idea in certain restaurants. This is one of those restaurants. They dragged me into the middle of the place and yelled "It's this girl's birthday! Throw peanuts at her while we sing!". The audience followed through, as this is a peanut-laden restaurant. Who the hell thought that throwing peanuts would be a pleasant birthday celebration? What happened to the clapping and free dessert accompanied by a copyright-safe song? Small projectiles and happiness don't mix except at 4th of July and New Years.

So this is all to lead you up to tonight, when I was at a lovely wine party hosted by my sister. First, her friends asked which one of us was older. ? Five years apart and you can't tell? I have young features! One time a lady almost didn't sell me a ticket to a PG-13 movie, so I had to show her my drivers license!! (I was 16). A high school teacher thought I was still in high school only four months ago!
Anyway, I guess they saw my grey hair, which is starting to become quite prominent when I part on the fault line.
I answered them, "I am only 21!". Or something to that effect.
My sister paused. "You are 22, Kara"

*Critical moment of social awkwardness. fight or flight kicked in. I chose fight. fatal mistake*

"Haha, no I am not! I am 21!"
"You were born in June of 1985. It is October" she said, with a wry smile.

I paused.
Crap...I am 22.

Who has arguments about their own age, and LOSES?

You know, we all have our lapses. Age forgetfulness is well accepted past 60. (I am 22, however)
As a single incident, this is just really funny. I was under the influence of a little wine, so silly mistakes happen. It was during that pause, however, that I realized I had been telling everyone I have met in the past 3 months that I am 21. All the people in my neuroscience program were surprised by my youth! I affirmed...yes! I am young for my grade!
I truly only became aware of the fact that I was 22 last night.
Tomorrow I have to confess to them all.

In my defense, my 22nd never really sank in, since it was right before my wedding. Who thinks about birthdays when your wedding is just around the corner?

But still...come on. I am supposed to be sharp, and with it and all.

So don't feel too bad Mom. I don't even keep up with my own birthdays anymore.